Friday, October 2, 2015

Arianna's Heart

Over the last week, my sweet Anna has made me cry on several occasions!  Not because she has done something wrong, but because she has a beautiful heart. During our losses this last year, she has always been in tune to mommy's sadness and been there. She knows just when momma needs a hug, an I love you, or a piece of art for our babies. 
This week, we were in the car and I started talking about a game we play on our iPads. I said "I have 2 babies ready in our game". Her response, I thought you were gonna say you have 2 babies in your belly. Wouldn't that be wonderful mommy. If you had 2 babies and none of them died."  My heart broke in that instant. Not only do I long for another child but so do my children. It's heartbreaking to know we can't give them that. 
Fast forward to tonight. The 3 kiddos were playing in the adjacent room. They were sitting down for school when Anna pipes in with "I feel like we are missing someone". Kaitlyn asked who. She said "our babies in the sky, the ones that died". Tears again for my sweet Anna's  longing heart!  
Last story, although there are dozens more. We had a project for school that asked what she wanted to save money for. Without hesitation, she said she wanted to save for a Paisley box. I have boxes at my bedside that keep all of our angel's keepsakes. Instead of a toy or something selfish, she wants to save for a memory box. Her theory, "because memories are more important than toys."  Tears again!!! She truly does have a beautiful heart. 
This is a picture from a month ago that she drew for me. She said it was me and she pointed out where she drew Paisley in my heart!  She is a very special girl. 


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